With Hope and a Kick in the Pants

Romantic Shorts is an idea that’s floated around my head/office/garbage can/notebook/purse/soul for almost twenty years. But now that it’s ‘out there,’ I am suffering from the most conflicting of feelings.

At times, I am overwhelmed with a sense of euphoric excitement akin to the I’M-GETTIN’-A-PUPPY-FOR-CHRISTMAS!! feeling I had when I was six. (I didn’t get the puppy, but I do remember the feeling.) I’m doing something that I am absolutely IN LOVE with!

But then there’s the doubt/fear/certainty that my dream job will fall flat, and I won’t even have the dream any more.

Then that fades, and I can see the potential for me, for new writers, for readers, for students, for moms, for ideas. It’s like looking at a clear night sky at the cottage; the longer you look the more stars you see and the brighter they get!

And then you realize how small and insignificant you are.

How will I know when this baby is breathing on its own?
How will I know if it’s dead?
Oh that it will grow up to be a fine, upstanding citizen…
What if it ends up marrying ‘Snake’ and finds itself a career in hard core porn?

I guess that if that kind of worry had a way of stopping us from acting on our deepest desires, the human race would have died out long ago.

And so, here is my baby – out there for everyone to love/hate/help/kill/watch/enjoy. Time will tell, and I now have no choice but to follow this road I’ve chosen.

It is my greatest hope that I will one day read what I have just written and laugh.

And maybe write about how foolish I was to worry about any of this at all.

Alexandra Brown, Chief Operations Manager

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Filed under For Readers, For Writers

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